I knew when we moved away two years ago to go into training, that life would never be the same. I knew when we returned home when it was all done that things would be different.
Knowing it and living it are two different things.
The reality of it all is setting in.
I knew it would be hard, but my heart wasn't prepared for it.
We moved back here in January after being gone a few years and so many things have changed. People have changed. Many I love, not everyone, but still. I am sure I have changed too.
It's a sad realization that the world went on without us, and friends have moved on. I know the world doesn't revolve around us...
They say they still care (and I know deep down that they do...maybe in a different way now) but we are slowly being forgotten. We are living an hour away from many of our friends currently so it makes it hard to connect. Most people can't or don't want to take the time to come here, so I make the drive there as often as I can to visit (totally NOT complaining, it is what it is and I don't mind the drive). I had a friend tell me recently that she forgets about us because we are "all the way over there".
I understand, I really do but it doesn't make the hurt any less.
It was my greatest fear, now being lived.
Out of sight out of mind.
It just makes me wonder.
When we are living half way across the world, who is going to care? Who will remember?
I have heard that once you face your fears you can then overcome them. Is this what the Lord will use to help me overcome?
I am thankful there is one friend who will never forget. I am thankful that He cares for my hurts (even if they sound selfish), and so I take my heart to Him, the one who will never leave or forsake.
*I hesitate to publish because I don't want to be misunderstood. However this journey we are on right now is a process, an amazing one but even so, sometimes it hurts. I just want to remember every step of the way because I know there are lessons to be learned here.
Knowing it and living it are two different things.
The reality of it all is setting in.
I knew it would be hard, but my heart wasn't prepared for it.
We moved back here in January after being gone a few years and so many things have changed. People have changed. Many I love, not everyone, but still. I am sure I have changed too.
It's a sad realization that the world went on without us, and friends have moved on. I know the world doesn't revolve around us...
They say they still care (and I know deep down that they do...maybe in a different way now) but we are slowly being forgotten. We are living an hour away from many of our friends currently so it makes it hard to connect. Most people can't or don't want to take the time to come here, so I make the drive there as often as I can to visit (totally NOT complaining, it is what it is and I don't mind the drive). I had a friend tell me recently that she forgets about us because we are "all the way over there".
I understand, I really do but it doesn't make the hurt any less.
It was my greatest fear, now being lived.
Out of sight out of mind.
It just makes me wonder.
When we are living half way across the world, who is going to care? Who will remember?
I have heard that once you face your fears you can then overcome them. Is this what the Lord will use to help me overcome?
I am thankful there is one friend who will never forget. I am thankful that He cares for my hurts (even if they sound selfish), and so I take my heart to Him, the one who will never leave or forsake.
*I hesitate to publish because I don't want to be misunderstood. However this journey we are on right now is a process, an amazing one but even so, sometimes it hurts. I just want to remember every step of the way because I know there are lessons to be learned here.
1 comment:
Thank you so much for sharing what has been on your heart. Your post reminds me of how I felt after college and moving away from everything and everyone that was familiar and comfortable to me. God likes to stretch us outside of our comfort zones. It's not always easy, but it is for God's glory. :-)
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